Friday, November 21, 2008

30%, like always

i feel like ive been treated like shit lately by my best friend.
treated bad to a point that i end up crying behind his back, on the bed about to sleep, under the shower, or just in my room.

i hate how im so weak now. people think that im strong, but really, im not.
im already splintered and bleeding nonstop that i think i can die from the lack of blood.

i wont be surprised.

people ive talked to might have gotten the impression of a "drama queen" from my ventings. but what i talked to them about is the pure reflection of what's been going on my life.

so today was friday, my lab got cancelled because we get a whole amount of hwk. so anyways, we were planning to go to Natick Mall (29ish miles away from worcester). i was so excited, like always. but the second fone call turned me down. of course this was coming, i saw it coming, but why didnt i notice it before?
see, im just so stupid.

whatever. i dont want to make judgements for my own emotions. its true ive been caught up with work but that doesnt interfer with outside-school stuff.
watever.

you'll see, how destructive i can be. just wait and see.

i already packed my shit from his place. i can be like blair wardolf from gossip girl. i can be a bitch. i can make people humiliate in public. i can burn their prides down within seconds.
life should revolve around myself (and a little of school).


just wait and see bitches out there.





then i ask myself, why am i wasting time burning their prides down etc. then i answer, thats because its fun to watch them go down to where they really belong.

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